Even If

The last couple months here in our family we have had to cling to God's plan and trust He knows best.  Last week was especially tough on my heart and faith and music is my way of communication so often. Hearing just the right song at just the right moment... Last week while in a moment of fear, this song came on. It is beautiful!

Mothers Day

If I'm being honest today was rough as mommy moments go. The kids stayed up late last night and woke up very early. Everyone was tired and cranky. I wasn't my best self and felt guilty about my failures today. Today's church service was much needed for this momma. A reminder that I'm not alone and that I have Christ to turn to who gives me grace when I mess up and who is there to help me with tomorrow. Currently bedtime is a struggle and tonight was no different. While Maverick cried, and Joe and I had been in and out of the room a few times, Nolan felt for his crying brother and grabbed his pillow and blankets and carried them to his brothers' room. He told Joe he needed to sleep on the floor "so that Maverick wouldn't be scared". My mommy heart just melted and Gods love shown through my 5 year olds heart. He wanted to take care of his brother. My boys fight, oh do they fight, but boy do they love. 💙💙💙 I am blessed. Exhausted but blessed. 😉 I want to remember these moments of love.

Happy Mothers Day

One Year Later

I cannot believe it has been a year since we went to Uganda to get our boys. What a change life has been.  A beautiful, chaotic, messy, emotional, lovely change.

These three boys are my world. They are so funny together. Maddox has truly started to do whatever it is Nolan is doing. He watches him all the time and Nolan loves it. He now has a little brother to tell what to do haha. Maverick joins in and plays too but he is currently more of a mommas boy and sticks close to me while he watches his crazy brothers. (Although you wouldn't be able to tell that from the picture above) 

These boys/brothers melt my heart and make me crazy. Yup, I said it. But what do you expect in a house full of boys... It is loud, messy, sometimes smelly lol but so full of love. I laugh at myself on the days when I can't wait for bedtime and then once they are in bed, its so quiet I just want to go snuggle with them.  I can't really say if its easier or harder than I thought it would be because I really wasn't sure what it was going to be like. I mean, I went from one child at home- to three little ones. It was an adjustment but I feel like we have a good routine going now. 

So... 2 TWO year olds in this house now... yay... haha

They are certainly growing up and forming quite the little opinions, but they are also so so SO sweet. They love to give high fives, hugs and kisses, and if they accidentally hurt someone, they are very quick to say "I'm sorry". Its the cutest thing ever. 

Going out is wild and crazy but we usually still have fun. The boys are very independent and always want to do things themselves. So you can imagine the messes we have X2. 

Nolan is a WONDERFUL big brother. Lately he has really stepped up to help me, and he asks to. I know won't last forever so I'm thankful for it now. He likes to get them up from their naps, help them potty and brush their teeth. Oh yay, did I mention we have been potty training for over a month now. I wish I could say it has been wonderful, but well.... it hasn't. There have been a whole lot of messes, a few tears shed (yes by me), some moments I wanted to quick, but I can say we are still sticking with it. They do pretty well for a while and then have horrible days of accident after accident. 

I am very thankful for our carpet cleaner, and steam vac. 

Mondays are the only day we don't have to get up and start running full speed to get Nolan to school on time, so we usually take things pretty easy and I love these moments. All snuggled up in daddy & mommy's bed. 

So, its been quite the year. 

May 18, 2015 the boys officially became Butlers. 

November 5th they turned two  

and November 8th marked our one year Gotcha Day. 

We are so very blessed. 

Happy 2nd birthday Maddox & Maverick

Nov. 8, 2014/Nov. 8, 2015

Notes I jotted down over the year:

Maverick:

In Africa he would sign please

Jan 12- says "Uh-Oh"

Jan 22- "Thank you"

Jan 23- "sit"

Jan 26- Claps his hands

Feb 1- "Who's that?"

Feb 1- Can point himself out in pictures

Feb 5- "Up"

Feb 10- Weighs 15.5lbs

Feb 21- says "Paps"

Feb 23- signs more

Feb 24- Recognized and says "puffs"

feb 26- says "Mama, Papaw, Tessa, Ali"

May 10- Walking

Oct 12- Potty Training and in underwear

Maddox:

In Africa would sign please

Jan 6- says "Thank you"

Jan 26- new tooth

Jan 26- Claps hands

Feb 1- Can point himself out in pictures

Feb 10- 17.1lbs

Feb 21- "Paps" & "Up"

feb 24- signs more

March 3- "Mama"

April 27- walking

July 16- Pooped in potty

Oct 12- potty training and in underwear

Oh my heart

Nov 3, 2014

What a blessed day it has been. God has truly calmed my nerves and has given me such a perfect day. Last night Nolan had a rough night, so this morning I woke up laying next to him and as he woke up he smiled the biggest smile, put his hands to my face and said "I love you mommy". These are the moments I treasure and dream of. Those precious mommy moments. Oh my heart. I sit here with tears running down my cheek as I think of moments like this and dream of these same moments with my babies. I want to be there for them, loving on them as they cry at night, even when you wake exhausted, you wake with love. Thinking of my 3 boys makes my heart burst. We hear things all the time about how blessed the boys and how awesome it is that we open our home to the twins, but honestly, we (both my husband and I) don't see it like that. We feel like we are the ones being blessed and we are the lucky ones to be able to have the honor of being their parents. That God would choose us to raise them, just as He chose us to raise Nolan.

Thank you God for letting me be their mommy!

Learning about "quiet time" with God

Nolan makes my heart smile. Last night after I put him to bed I came in my room to read my Bible and he found me. I explained "quiet time" and sent him back to bed. So tonight after putting him to bed, he got up again and this time I was still downstairs. He asked me what I was doing and said I forgot to do my quiet time and read my Bible. The fact that he remembered... I just love him so much. So we talked about the fact that we will need to make sure he gets quiet time tomorrow to read his Bible. 

He is growing up so fast and I pray he continues to have a loving heart and a heart for God. 

As a parent that is my greatest desire for my kids. To follow the will of God. 

.... He also (earlier) talked about how he can't wait to married. It's pretty cute. He often says he wants to marry me and I remind him that I'm already married to daddy. I remind him that one day he will find a girl and he needs to be kind, loving and respectful and that he will meet a girl who is kind, loving, respectful and loves God just like you.